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the upside of greed

I’m back on Instagram (mistake) and consuming so much content about how to make winter bearable, but it is very difficult to romanticize your life when you have small children. There is nothing romantic about your two-year-old puking into your open palm. No amount of flickering candlelight will obscure the snot trails your kids left on the couch.

sick kids, fancy jewels, a cake to bake, a book i read, sophie blackall’s sea wheels

I could give you a litany of all the ways this winter has been bleak and relentless; an inventory of the various illnesses my disgusting offspring have brought home; my thoughts about the systematic undermining of our democracy - - but but but - - you all know that already. The joy of writing this newsletter for the six people who actually read it is that I don’t need to explain myself to anyone. We’re all in this boat together.

So instead, here’s a list I made back in January of what I wanted MORE of in 2025. I tend not to make resolutions anymore, but I do love thinking about abundance, about what wakes me up and how to invite that in, about gluttony and greed and grasping, insatiable delight. This is not about consumption so much as it is about desire and wholeness. Greed gets a bad rap because it is so impossibly tied to men and their need to hoard power and money, but I love the feeling of greed. I love feeling hungry. It is what makes me feel alive. I am at my most human when I am wanting something, when that want threatens to burst open my chest. It’s when I am also my most generous, because I simply cannot contain as much as I want. I will always, always need to share it.

Tell me what you want more of this year, if you’re so inclined? (And yes, it goes without saying that what I really want more of is ACTUAL HUMAN DECENCY!!!!)

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• pleasure

• cut flowers in weird thrifted vessels

• grounding

• daylight first thing and blue-light blocking at night

• sweet-smelling oils

• gentle movement, like walking and stretching and dancing and hip opening

• core strength

• hand-written letters and postcards just because

• photos of the people I love on my walls

• at-home manicures

• rich lotions

• protein and fat fatty fats

• saunas

• gua sha

• facials

• bouncy shiny hair

• dry brushing

• hair cuts for and from friends

• local shopping

• good underwear

• new bras

• soft clothes

• sparkly treasures

• perfume

• coddling

• kindness

• iron supplements

• music, all the time

• challenging books and movies and tv shows

• museums

• backlist novels

• tarot cards

• dinners

• good wine

• theatre, always

• deepening existing friendships

• building community

• mutual aid

• thrifting, making, mending

• decadence

• pantry cooking

• low-stress dinner parties

• standing dates

• piles of kids

• cloth napkins

• dropping off pastries

• chai

• candles

• colourful rugs

• sunshine

• writing weird things on a whim